Beautiful Disaster

I was saddened to read Saturday that Tammy Faye Bakker Messner had gone to be with the Lord after an extended battle with colon cancer that had spread to her lungs. I do not remember a time when I did not know who Tammy Faye was. I always thought she was the biggest nut in the world. In an earlier life, I thought she was probably the Devil incarnate and she and her husband would get theirs. Funny thing is that when they did, in fact, get theirs I felt no sense of just recompense. And the further I get from those long ago days (twenty years ago now), the more compassion I had for her and for the manner in which the PTL ministry fell from grace. It is amazing how far from God we can get when we are sincerely trying to do what we think He wants. It was not too long ago that I mentioned the passing of Rev. Jerry Falwell and there must be some sense of irony that these two seminal figures of the late 1908s televangelism scandals died within months of each other.

What I have learned is to respect those I do not understand. I never got Tammy Faye or her overly emotional way of life, until I saw her on "The Surreal Life" with the likes of rapper Vanilla Ice and porn star Ron Jeremy. It was fascinating to watch her with these people who were by no means believers. She was gracious and compassionate and completely honest about her faith. I think she was a shining light to these people of what Christ in a person can do. She was also open to the gay community who embraced her as an icon. She said something to the effect that God made us all from the same dirt. It is amazing how powerful words can be, but even more powerful an act of kindness, with no expectations or conditions. Though most people could not see past her makeup, she really loved God and loved people.

We had a funeral for a man that I have only known for 18 months. He was probably the first person I met when I moved to Panama City. He sought me out to introduce himself and to offer his services. He told me that if I ever needed anything, he would work to get it for me. That if he couldn't raise money for the music ministry of the church in a short period of time, he was no good to me. Now, this man did not really attend the church all that often. His wife was there every Sunday and they both came to the fellowship supper we have on Wednesday evenings, but I rarely saw him at church. Now, the funny thing is, this man embodied what is good about the church. In fact, he was the church to many people that he met. Now, he smoked like a stack and he drank for a lot of years before he asked the Lord to help him quit, things that most evangelicals would look at and call sin. But he was compassionate and kind, and he would tell you the truth which is a gift to anyone. He overtipped waitresses and hugged people in restaurants. He showed Jesus to a lot of people. He was the church, a new definition of church, and now he is a part of the church triumphant.

So my question is: How can I better demonstrate the love of Christ in a way that is not biased by my own preconceptions of church or what Christians ought to be like?

My prayer is that I do not merely have good intentions to live the Christ life before the world, that I would not want to be a servant to demonstrate just how much of a martyr I can be, but that I would truly, undeniably surrender to a love that will not let me go.

BTW~Have you heard of Jon McLaughlin? He's not the coolest thing I have ever heard. Plays the piano and sings. Kinda like Jon Mayer, but a much better voice and some great lyrics. He's a Christian, though most of his songs are not about God. So, if you are looking for a "Jesus count" it would be really low. ; )