Losing It

Okay, so I usually do my best to keep my cool and never let things get to me publicly. Well, today was a weird day. I woke up early and ran on the treadmill. Fine. Madeline was up really early and so our routine was off. I forgot her favorite blanket, the one she cannot live without. Granted, she did not realize we were sans blanket until we were almost to church. By that time it was too late. My sister had surgery this morning, so I admit, I was worried most of the morning and not really myself. I hate being so far away for big things like this. And these last couple of days have been really busy for no apparent reason. Lots of folks bearing their souls and all and I have been kind of emotionally drained as a result.

So, I went to class at 12:30 and played a video for a few minutes and went on with my lecture on Baroque vocal music. If I have favorite topics, this is one of them. We talked about castrati and Monteverdi and Purcell and Handel. We listened to some fine music and then I went berserk (in a professional manner, of course). I noticed all along a couple of students talking amongst themselves. I usually take no issue with this behavior, at least they are engaging the subject even if it is in a negative way. But then, three or four of them started putting their heads down on their desks. I was not really happy and so I told them so.

I basically told them the following:

1. You are paying for this class.

2. If I have to be here then you have to be here and be engaged.

3. It is rude to treat a professor in this manner.

4. You can leave, but I will count you absent.

5. I really do not care if you do not enjoy this material, it is part of the class that you paid for.

6. If you do not want to be cultural morons, you need to have a cursory knowledge of music and art.

Well I left off the last one, but it is true.

I am sort of over it, but I let class out a little early because my train of thought was gone at that point. And I am as entertaining as the material will allow me to be. How often can one relate the music of the Renaissance to Brittany Spears? It is hard to do friends. I have one student who likes to get up every class period and leave to go the restroom. I want to say, "You are an adult and you can probably go before class." He also fits a horrible stereotype that us progressives hate to admit to most of the time, but that topic is for another day. I am becoming more and more concerned with student performance. I have talked about this before, but it is alarming how passive my students are. They are used to being told how to think, they watch so much television and spend so much time on the internet they have grown passive to the learning process. They think they can act however they want since the professor is there whether or not they engage in the class or are there physically at all--just like a TV or a computer. It worries me. Granted, these are not Ivy Leaguers here, but I think one can expect some sense of decorum in the classroom.

I can say in all honesty that I did not enjoy several classes I took in college, but I had the decency to skip those classes when I thought I could not pretend to be interested. Take for instance the one class I made a C in ever. I had this early morning general physics course that met like 4 times a week and did not have a real attendance policy. I hated this course because I was stupid enough to wait until my Junior year to take it and all I wanted to take were music courses by that time. So, I never went, showed up for tests, turned in my paper and did pretty well in the class until the final. All I needed was like a 70 to get a B in the class and I ended up with a C. According to the Preppy Handbook it is perfectly legitimate to earn a C in a science class. It is completely inappropriate to earn one in Music Appreciation. But several of my students may be well on their way.

Oh well, I am probably getting old and glossing over much that I wish to forget, but it does bother me that my students on the whole are not able to synthesize information very well. For instance, I try to set the music we listen to and study in historical and cultural context. I try to remember what I would have known coming out of high school and attempt to relate the music to those areas of literature, history, etc. that I think they should know. I feel like the professor in Ferris Bueller half the time. No one seems to know any of these things, and worse yet they seem to wonder what possible good there would be in knowing these things. I think this perceived apathy is what sent me over the edge today. I was just tired of it.

And another thing: What movies are young people watching today that speak to their generation? I am having a hard time figuring this one out, so help me here. I was up late last Thursday night watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off and really began to wonder about what defining pop-cultural moments they have had. I mean, we had the John Hughes oeuvre (Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club) and Bueller, Better Off Dead, et al. But what is their defining movie? Does this matter anymore? Have the youth of America become too ironic or too detached to be defined by something like a movie?

BTW: Has anybody seen my 2 dollars?