Asking the Wrong Questions

I was talking to a friend about the state of the Church and she mentioned an interesting converstaion she had recently with a pastor from Kenya. The comment that he made that stood out the most to me was something like "I love this country [speaking of the United States], but I do not let it become part of me." I thought this was a profound statement, full of truth. She believed this was very significant and was concerned that we were not doing enough in America to build the Kingdom. She also questioned why we do not see many [any] signs and wonders in America when there are reports of amazing things that God is doing in Africa and other parts of the world. When she related this to me, my response to her was "I wonder if we are asking the right questions." She looked a little puzzled, and so I clarified my response.

I believe that the Church in America has bought into the lie that our rights matter. We complain that our rights are being violated because we cannot pray in school or we have abortion on demand or whatever the new issue may be; but we do so very little to get to know God enough to know what He would have us do. We fight over musical styles in our churches, and try our hardest to think up new programs that will fill the seats, but we are devoid of the Spirit of God. I am afraid that when the Spirit makes an appearance in our churches we are so unprepared for Him that we miss our opportunities. In ministry we talk a lot about providing meaningful opportunities for people to experience God, but I wonder if we are fulfilling true needs in peoples' lives or only our perceptions of their needs. I feel that if we spent more time praying and more time doing the work of God, we would complain less about the ills of our society, a society that we built, and get about the Father's business of accomplishing His will on earth, just as it is in heaven. I am afraid that we need to beg for forgiveness of our well-meaning, but still completely oblivious missteps when it comes to meeting the needs of the world.

We are too busy believing that God cares about our rights. I think the idea of Christian rights is completely unscriptural. It seems that Jesus told us if we are to be his disciples we are to DENY ourselves, take up our cross, and follow Him. Paul reiterates this idea when he says that he is crucified with Christ. If we truly are His disciples, we will not be able to tell the difference between His will and our own--it will be the same agenda. The early church was not concerned with political agendas because it was too concerned about getting the word out about Jesus. Because they truly believed Jesus would return anytime, there was no time to complain about the emperor's newest edict. I hear people concerned that there will be a great day of reckoning for the church in America and I am sure that it will happen someday. Some want to blame it on pluralism others on the rise of Muslim immigration to America, but I want to put the blame where it belongs. It starts with me and the rest of the church that has been too busy to notice the tares that have been sown all around us, the tares that are choking us to death, the tares that we planted when we decided to be worried about things that do not matter. Lord, open our eyes to see the world as you see it and not through our own very cloudy vision. Lord, help us to understand that just because we have been blessed it does not give us the right to lord it over others or to expect that we deserve it by divine right. Help us to be ready for that day of reckoning, and not be caught unawares doing the "work of the Lord" only to have You tell us "I never knew you."

Propaganda and the Liberal Media

I have not posted anything in quite some time, so I guess it is about time I shared another bit of wisdom I have been chewing on lately. With the upcoming election in November looming over us and the prospects for 2008 already starting to line up, I guess it is time to weigh in on the topic. Not that I have any expertise on things political, but I have touched on some of these issues before so they won't be new.

I remember being in college in 1992 when Bill Clinton was elected president. I remember thinking that he was probably the antichrist, but I really felt like he would win, especially with Ross Perot splintering the Republican vote. I wanted to vote for Clinton because I wanted to be on the winning side, but instead voted with my conscience to stay the course with George Bush Sr. Of course, that logic failed along with the Bush campaign and the religious right became a force to be reckoned with shortly thereafter. Since Clinton was liberal and the media was the whore of Babylon, the world must soon come to an end. I remember the 1994 election and the contract with America that Republican congressional officials made with the country. I remember that November night thinking, we'll show them, now the Lord will have his due. Well, we have had 12 years of Republican control of both houses of Congress and 6 years of that under a Republican president and I have come to realize one thing: more governing actually seems to take place when there is a balance of the two parties.

I guess what I am trying to say is: "Let the Democrats have it back!" At least that will give evangelicals something legitimate to complain about. It is astonishing to me to hear people complain about congress and their lack of accomplishment when we are the ones who put them there. We have become so afraid of Osama bin whoever, that we forget that we serve a God who is in control of all situations, and this is true whether there is a Republican or a Democrat is in the white house. It is funny that I still hear complaints about the liberal bias in the media, but there has to be a balance between the very conservative government and the media coverage. I do not remember any conservatives complaining that Rush Limbaugh was not giving a balanced view of President Clinton.

I was reading an article in Texas Monthly about the state of politics in Texas and how the GOP state convention was basically a diatribe against illegal immigration and the wall that they want to build along the border. Honestly, I didn't realize there was one person in Texas who did not realize there were illegal immigrants living there. So now that we have an election, we have to stir up fears about the border and a wall to keep all of the illegals and other ne'er do wells out of our borders. OR, is it possible, the wall is not to keep out whoever wants to get into the country, but to keep our culture monolithic in its outlook. We talk a lot about multicultural in church but when we get right down to it, it is just talk. We really do not want people around us who make us think or challenge our comfort level, especially with regard to our faith. I am challenged everyday, and I don't like it. But it is the best thing for me and it makes me stronger. It makes me know myself better. These border fears remind me a lot of there Y2K conspiracy. It is funny how people of faith were the ones that made the biggest uproar about Y2K and its possible repercussions. How is it that we have such faith in the end of the world, but so little faith in the Savior of the world?

The older I get the less sure I am of any of former convictions. I realize now that God does not care as much about some of these little things. I am not talking about the basics of the faith here. I am talking about things that matter little for the Kingdom. Just like I don't think a fence on the border of Mexico is the answer to our immigration problems, I do not think that picketing abortion clinics or rallying against Democrats is going to win anyone to the Kingdom.

So if the Democrats take the Congress and Hillary becomes president in 2008, or if the Republicans keep Congress and John McCain takes the white house, God is still in control. My prayer is that we as Christians do not allow our fears to dictate how we work and live. When it comes right down to it, we are most effective when we are salt and light in the world, rather than avoiding the world at all costs. As for me, I think I am going to vote for Jesus in the next election, and the last time I looked, he was an independent. And I no longer think Bubba is the antichrist, but the jury is out on . . .

A Battle of Wills

I have been learning a lot about patience these last several weeks. For a couple of weeks of August I was determined that my three-year-old daughter would master the art of the potty. She is definitely as strong-willed child and so this has been a learning time for both of us. Who is going to be in control at the end of the day? Well, it turns out that after a week of constant supervision, she finally did master the art and even decided it was proper to go without being asked "Do you need to go potty?" It has been wonderful and in the end she realized that she was more in control by going to the potty than by making me and her mom clean up after her. I am just glad that I lived through it.

My nerves have rarely been as brittle as they were during this period of the battle of wills. This battle has taught me a thing or two about being patient. I am trying to learn to apply this hard-learned lesson to my work in the church. I have the privilege of working with some of the most compassionate and caring individuals I have met. They have made my transition to full-time church ministry much easier. But, I have one situation that continues to rear its head and I have come to a realization: I want to be in control and it bothers me that I cannot control the situation. I usually have a way of diffusing tense situations, but again this is a way for me to be in control. I am having to learn to give those things that I cannot control over to the Lord, rather than trying to work them out myself. And I am good at working them out myself. Again, it is about control. Just like my little one and her potty problems, always wanting to control or dominate situations she finds herself in, I want to do the same, albeit in a much more genteel way. It has to be about letting Him work it out. We spend so much of our time fighting battles, when God asks us to praise Him and let Him fight the battles for us. And we wonder why we don't win these battles or why they keep coming back to haunt us.

The pictures above are ones I took last year in Egypt. The Sphinx is an amazing sight, so old and mysterious and very patient. I guess a rock really is not patient, just stuck in one place. But it has no control over its surroundings or what happens to it. I pray that one day I will be able to give up control of all this mess and allow God to take control so that I don't have to worry about it anymore. Let it be today!

Sticking to the Status Quo

I have three little girls that are definitely the spice of my life. Even though they are young, my daughters love those tween shows that are on Disney and Nickelodeon. Several months ago, the Disney channel had a big hit called "High School Musical." It is cheesy and tweeny and they love it. We have the DVD and watch it all the time. They sing along to the songs in the car. I must admit that I think it is really a good little musical and I personally know most of the songs myself. Embarrassing, but true. I was struck by one of the songs because it hits a nerve with a lot of people in the church these day--the status quo. The song says something to this effect: "Stick to the status quo. It's better by far to leave things as they are." It was unnerving.

We talk a lot about the status quo in the church these days and I am not sure what the main reason for all this worry is. It could be that in America, people have been leaving the church, especially mainline denominations, in a steady stream for many years. I am a member of a United Methodist church, which came into being in 1968. At that time, there were over 11 million adherents in the USA. Now there are closer to 8 million. For many this is an alarm that says the status quo needs to be adjusted. We can't do church as usual anymore. I remember in Bob Sorge's book Exploring Worship that the seven last words of a dying church are: "We've never done it that way before."

But changing the status quo is a major undertaking and requires that everyone in a particular church body is behind the change. It takes vision, which, oftentimes, is lacking in our churches. We are more worried about getting people to church than we are about truly reaching the lost. It is so much easier to sit in church and wait for the lost to come to our church, but how realistic is this? I sit in an office that is right across from the main church office. People in crisis come in four days a week to receive food or monetary assistance. I think this is a wonderful thing the church does and the church in general needs to do more of these things. But I wonder if this is really reaching anyone for Jesus. Maybe it is, I am just not seeing these folks come to church after they have been helped. Maybe our assistance is a seed that will grow into something greater some day. Maybe we are helping the needy keep their own status quo.

The picture above is one I took in the Old City in Jerusalem at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. I was especially interested in the ladder that sits on a cornice above the main entrance to the church. During Ottoman rule, several Christian churches (Greek Orthodox, Roman Catholic, Armenian, etc.) fought over their rights to the church built where many believe Christ died and was resurrected. The Ottomans established a Status Quo for the church and granted ownership to six different Christian bodies. From what I gather, the windows belong to the Armenians, but there is a question as to whether the Armenians or the Greeks own the cornice that the ladder sits on. The ladder belongs to the Armenians, and has sat in the same place for over 150 years because the Greeks wanted them to move it, but they refused--all because of the status quo.

Now, I know we would never argue within our churches about something as silly as moving a ladder, but we do argue about coffee, carpet, and other equally insignificant things. And usually, our arguments end up being a test of the status quo.

Today, I want to acknowledge that I enjoy things as they are and do not enjoy change. However, God has blessed me by not allowing me to keep the quo. If He did allow me to keep things as they are, I would not be writing from my desk in Florida, but from my desk in Texas. It was not a bad situation, just the status quo for me. I am thankful that I can see new and different horizons.

And, by the way, the Church of the Holy Sepulchre is not the most beautiful church in Christendom. The ladder is actually a tasteful addition to the facade.

Winning the Culture War

While I was growing up in Oklahoma, I used to frequent Christian bookstores and if you ever go to them yourself, you know there is a kind of "underground" world that evangelicals move in. I was never made more aware of this fact than when I first moved to Texas and went to one of the largest Christian bookstores in the world, literally. Beside the little Testamints that I found at the check out counter, there was a little telephone directory of places owned and operated by evangelicals. It was touted as a wonderful tool for all believers to use in order to help fellow believers who were in business. I picked it up and took it home with me and never really used it. It struck me--When did it become necessary for Christians to completely shun going into the world? I remember asking an older colleague of mine who was reared in a very strict Pentecostal home why she never went to sporting events when I knew she kept up with all the local high school scores. She told me that, though she did not think it was wrong to attend, she did not because while she was growing up, Pentecostals just did not do anything that the world liked to do. I always wanted to say, "Well, the world eats chocolate. Did you refrain from eating chocolate because it was too worldly? I digress.

When did it become necessary for evangelicals to completely separate from the world? Jesus told us to be in the world, but not of it. I know this is a difficult balance, but we have to be in the world in order to minister to the world. I recall discussing this issue in a class I taught on worship in the church. The discussion would go something like: "We speak a language that the world does not understand. We expect that a sinner who comes to the Lord will automatically stop all their vices and wear the same clothes that we do, our we question the authenticity of their salvation experience. We only go to stores and restaurants that are owned or operated by Christians. And we spend a whole lot of time in our churches feeling very good about ourselves and talking about how we need to touch the world, but we never come into contact with any one who does not know the Lord. How can we reach the world if we are not ever in it?"

And, another thing, when did Jesus become a Republican? I grew up in the Reagan era and, as I recall, this was about the time that I started hearing stirrings from the "religious right" and this always meant conservative Republicans. I remember my grandfather was a staunch Democrat, but had been reared in a pastor's home and was a lay leader in his church for many years. I always wondered how he could justify being a Democrat when all Democrats stood for evil--like abortion, homosexuality, riotous living, etc. My mother once told him that he would vote for the Devil himself if he was a Democrat. I thought it was funny that he told her he would have to think about that.

Well, there was this interesting article in the New York Times yesterday called "Disowning Conservative Politics, Evangelical Pastor Rattles Flock." The article was about an evangelical minister from Minnesota who became aggravated by certain members of his congregation who wanted him to announce a rally against gay marriage, or introduce a politician visiting the church, or to allow them to set up an anti-abortion table in the lobby, you get the idea. The minister concluded that when Christians win the culture war we inevitably lose because we, in fact, become the world. Jesus Christ, not America, is the light of the world and the hope for the world.

He discusses further significant concerns that the church in general really needs to come to terms with. How can we be salt and light if we are totally removed from the world? I think Boyd is correct in warning that when the church wins the culture war against the world it becomes the world. And, when our political agendas fall so heavily on one or two key issues (abortion or homosexual marriage) and forget other, sometimes greater issues, like hungry children, a better educational system, etc., who is to blame when these issues are not met? The early church filled a need in the society of its day by starting hospitals and caring for widow and orphans. One of the reasons that Christianity won out and became the official religion of the Roman Empire was that they were so heavily involved in the political system that the government and social services stopped whenever there was any kind of anti-Christian persecution. Now, history knows what happened when the early Christians won their culture war. It led to a period Protestants consider one of the darkest times in church history.

How far have we come from the lofty pursuit of "doing justice, and loving kindness, and walking humbly with our God" (Micah 6:8 paraphrase) when we feel like we are serving God's purpose by sitting in our churches and proclaiming our love for the world from a safe distance. It is hard to love people when we are so angry with their state of life. It is impossible to win the world without bumping into it, making a mess of our easy answers. We are meant to be agents of change in our world, but can't we do this without giving up our compassion, our humanity? I want to be just, and love kindness, and walk humbly with God without being judgmental. I want to be less judgmental and more compassionate with every person I meet. I want to be Christ to the world, so I guess I'm going to have to embrace the world as Christ did. I guess I will be calling all my "sinner" friends to go out to dinner. It's what Jesus would do!

Wars and Rumors of Wars

I think I am tired of living in the "End Times." Granted, I think the end times began as soon as Jesus left this earth, so I guess I am going to have to get over it. When I was growing up as a fundy, we talked about the end times and the rapture and Jesus' return a lot. Well, mostly we talked about the great tribulation and how we definitely did not want to be here on earth when the tribulation began or we might get our heads cut off for our faith--if we found faith again during that time. I remember watching with horror those movies from the 70s about the rapture. It is ironic now that the type of church they portrayed in the first movie looks a whole lot like a Methodist church. Since I work in a Methodist church now, it is both offensive and exhilarating at the same time. I digress.

I guess what bothers me the most is that every time a war breaks out, any where, or at least any place that involves the United States, people immediately start saying that the end is near. Now, I can't refute that completely, because I do not know when He will return, but, then again, neither does anyone else. I will hear people quote the verse about wars and rumors of wars and suggest that this alone indicates the end is near. What bothers me about this is they forget the rest of the verse. In Matthew 24, the disciples ask Jesus about the signs of the end times. Now, I believe they thought it would happen in their own day, just like we do, so they were especially interested in when the kingdom would come. So, Jesus says: "See that no one leads you astray. For many will come in my name, saying, 'I am the Christ,' and they will lead many astray. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains." (Matthew 24:4-8 ESV) We like to major on the minor points of wars and earthquakes, but forget the more significant indicator which comes a few verses later: "And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed throughout the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come." (v. 14)


For those of you who have been watching the news lately, here are some pictures I took last year in a fairly peaceful Israel. The top picture is taken from Safed, one of the first Israeli cities to be targeted by Hezbollah. I did not realize at the time I was there that Safed was only 12 miles from the Lebanese border. Safed is a center for study of the Kabbalah. This picture is taken facing south towards Tiberias and shows the ruins of a synagogue. The next picture is a shot of the northern portion of the Sea of Galilee taken from the Golan Heights, the disputed area of land that used to belong to Syria.

The top picture is a shot of the Sea of Galilee from the northwestern side taken on the traditional mount of Beatitudes. Galilee was very lush when I visited in March of 2005. The last picture is for the End Times fans. This is the valley of Jezreel or the valley of Armageddon if you prefer. It was taken from Megiddo looking to the east. Of course, while I was there, I could hear the Israeli air force jets flying overhead.

Now, don't get me wrong, I think it is important that we are all ready for the end to come. But I think we sometimes put much more emphasis on the end of the world than we do on saving the world before that time comes. One great thing about the Methodist church is that they really do not take a strong stand on eschatological issues, rather, they spend most of their time trying to make a difference in this present age. Jesus taught His disciples: "We must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; night is coming, when no one can work. As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world." (John 9:4-5 ESV)

Let's get to work!

Musings on World Travel

While I was growing up in Oklahoma City, I always wanted to travel the world, but the furthest I got was Mexico City. In the last five years, I have set foot on four continents other than North America and I have seen many an interesting sight.

Here I am in Jerusalem on the Mount of Olives overlooking the Temple Mount and the Dome of the Rock (2005). That was an unbelievable trip. In a future post I will publish some of the photos I took while in Israel. I visited some of the places that have been in the news recently.

Here I am on the Giza plateau (2005). That was an experience that is
difficult to put into words. After seeing the pyramids and the sphinx,
monuments that are older than Abraham, you begin to reconsider the
significance of your own life issues. Time itself fears the pyramids.

Here I am in Saint Peter's square in 2001, just six weeks before 9/11. This
was my first trip to Europe and I went by myself. I got lost in Rome in the
middle of the night trying to find my hotel after visiting the Trevi fountain
and the Spanish steps. I was such a tourist. I would love to go back. I would
never wear a shirt with an American flag on it today.

I always liked this picture from my trip to Paris (2004). Misty and I spent a year celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary and this was our first overseas trip together. We went to the Louvre and the Musee d'Orsay and Notre Dame. We stayed in a wonderful little nineteenth-century hotel a block from the Louvre. This picture of me was taken on a bridge over the Seine. The picture of Misty, which is one of my favorites of her, was taken on one of those double-decker tour buses. It was so cold (it snowed outside Notre Dame) and we had one of the best times we have ever had.

You can see the beaches of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil behind me. I am actually up by the huge statue of Christ that overlooks the city of Rio. That was a great trip as well (2002).

Some folks don't like to travel, but there came a point in my life when I decided I wanted to touch the earth and see things with my own eyes, not just read about them in National Geographic. Traveling the world has given me a wealth of perspective on my own life and life in America. I love America and I am fortunate to live here, but I need an international trip every so often to keep my sanity.

Napoleon Dynamite and Other Rantings

I came to a grand realization last week. I am old and only 34 years old. I had always felt like I was up on what was the "in" thing if, for no other reason than to make a mockery of it. And, having spent 10 years teaching in a college and developing a great rapport with late teens and twentysomethings, I really felt like there was at least a connection to "youth." Well, I broke down and watched Napoleon Dynamite finally. All of my college students told me last year that I should watch it, but I refused. And, now I know why . . . I just do not get it. Now, there were definitely some funny parts. I do wonder about my skill level and that bit with the glamour shots was hilarious, but I just don't get it. I am over it. I guess I really need to look into my retirement portfolio.

I guess part of my feeling "old" was that a friend of mine from high school decided to try to find all of our graduating class. This is not so difficult when you consider there were only 39 in the entire class. It was amazing that she was able to find most of us in a short time. This process brought back some great memories and some awful ones as well. I was reminded of one of my most embarrassing moments. No need to go into that now, but it was a learning experience that I took with me into my adulthood. Just did not need to be reminded of it.

I guess my high school experience was on the whole a good one, but I was done when it was over. I always felt like there was so much more to learn than I was afforded at my private evangelical Christian school (Did you see the movie Saved?). Honestly, I am pleased that I have such a fundy background. It has grounded me and helped me to ask the proper questions of life and faith. Just because I do not believe things in the exact way that I did when I was growing up is not an issue of giving up on faith, but an evolution of faith. This evolution has meant that I have come to know myself and my faith a whole lot better. It has meant that I no longer have answers to certain questions any more. But it also means that I can rely on the mystery of God a lot more. I can say, "I don't get it. It's a mystery, but that's the way God is" and actually mean it. Now I can honestly say I don't care if we ever find Noah's ark or whether the sons of God in Genesis 6 are actually angels or the descendants of Seth or aliens (I don't believe they were aliens by the way). It does not affect my relationship with God one iota. Faith is just that--faith, something you believe without seeing. If I need to find the ark of the covenant to believe that it existed, what kind of faith is that? If the shroud of Turin ends up being a fraud, so what? And all of these things really have nothing to do with who Jesus claimed to be, and that is the bottom line for me. I digress.

I may not get Napoleon Dynamite, but I should have seen it coming. I have to confess, my pop culture references in my classes were beginning to receive glazed over looks. Can you believe, students nowadays do not know who Ferris Bueller was? I'll take Ferris over Napoleon anyday! Anyone? Anyone?

A New Perspective on Life

Well, it has been almost six months since I left my life as a college music professor in Texas to serve as a music director in a United Methodist church in Florida. It has been a weird transition for me, since I was so used to my life in Texas. It has been a little identity crisis for me. I remember talking to this man about ministry a few years ago when the possibility of making a life change first came into my mind. He told me that it was always important to have a platform for your ministry and that if you give that up it can be difficult to regain it. I have come to believe he was right. Now, don't get me wrong, I am in the right place for me and for my family at this time in our lives. We really needed a life adventure and this has definitely been an adventure. Everyone at our church has been very warm and welcoming. I feel more at home in this church than I ever did in the churches I served in before.

A former colleague of mine recently said something like this: " I am a Pentecostal, but not really." When she said this, it resonated with me , though she was talking about herself. I felt this way for many years, and it has only been in stepping out of a Pentecostal church and college environment that I have realized my place was not there. Now, this does not mean that I would trade that life experience for anything. I think it has helped give me great insight. Though, at this point, I am not completely sure what that insight will lead to. I had another friend recently tell me that he never thought I was happy--that I had everything most people would want and was still miserable. He was right. I think it was mainly because I had gone as far as that life paradigm would allow me to go. It is hard to feel like you peaked at 24. I just could not bear to live that way.

For several years I knew that I would make this move, though I did not realize it would mean a move across the country. However, in a lot of ways, this big move has made it easier to transition to a "mainline" denomination. Mainline is such a dirty word in my former circle. It has meant that I do not have to look at my former life everyday. I think it would have been much harder making this transition in faith (and job and life) if we had stayed in the same house in the same town. I know there are some of my former colleagues and students who would think I have totally backslidden, gone the wicked way, however you want to put it, because I have become affiliated with the United Methodist Church. All I can say is that God was in this change and I am thankful for it. Now, I don't know if I will do this forever or if I will go back to teaching some years down the line. But one thing I have learned through this journey is that nothing in this life is forever. I had gotten to a point in Texas where I felt like there was nothing else I could do and that I would be there forever. Now, I believe I am ready for whatever God calls me to do, probably for the first time in my life. And, gasp, I am a liberal Protestant!